Saturday, March 31, 2012

Apologies & Atonement....

Hi friends!

Its been a while...I know....and I am sorry. Today is Saturday and I did not weigh in because I met a friend for coffee & to talk. We were the best of friends in high school and over the years have always stayed in touch. The past 3 years we have been very close & some incidents transpired & we  had some words last year & haven't spoken since.It was kind of ugly to be quite honest, and today, it was time to make amends. We talked for about an hour and a half at a local coffee spot, said our "I'm sorry's" and talked about things that were said regretfully and all is now water under the bridge, and I couldn't be happier to have my friend back in my life! There is something to be said about the power of forgiveness. It truly does free the soul!

As it would be, the scale at my house was looking very good too! I think I was down about 1#, but it was more important for me to have atonement with my friend. I have no regrets. My friend also commented that I had lost alot of weight. Made me feel good to hear that!

 The taste buds are still status quo. I thought they were getting better, but honestly, not really. Food in general just tastes yucky. I find myself searching for something that tastes good and I think that's why I'm not dropping weight like crazy. I should be for heavens sake!

Tomorrow starts a new month and I want April to be a month of focus and weight loss. I want to be on program 100% all of the time like Rosalie. That is my goal for the month.

On a fun side note, I went to Kohl's with my 30% off coupon that expired today and bought some really adorable Capri's. I LOVE Capri's and pray they never go out of style! I bought a denim pr, a white pr with really cute white embroidery around the front & back pockets , a pr of white Levis shorts for summer, and also another pr of black Capri's that are the Chaps brand which fit me like a glove usually. I had to special order a pr (they didn't have enough in stock) in a size 16 for some reason. I did buy a pr of them in 14s but they just feel too snug & I have the ole muffin top when I wear them. I know another 10# off & they will look better but until then, I will wear the 16s & have them look decent. I got them for $13 with my 30% off, Kohl's cash & free shipping. Cant beat that!   Everything else was bought in a size 14 still but I would rather have something fit properly than buy something smaller that I will look like a sausage in or will never wear. I also bought a few tops the other day & I think I will need to take the one back & get a medium...its just too big, even my hubby agrees. And to think that 1 year ago I was wearing an XL or 1X in Womens. I think underneath it all, there is a skinny chick waiting to be hatched. lol. I do have small wrists & ankles & these darned legs are getting so skinny!! I wish it would go from my belly instead. I know, I know, I need to follow the BFC! Im not kidding here though, the legs on pants are getting pretty baggy these days. I do wish I had nice curves though & a nice waist. I am kind of straight up & down. I need to wear a mid rise or something a little higher up to give the illusion of a waist. I envy people with nice curves although there are probably alot of people who envy a skinny butt & legs which I have.

So that's it for this girl tonight. Hope you are all doing great! Miss you all and sorry to be such a  stranger. Life's been busy with soccer & softball games after school & then throw work in too and by the time I get home, I'm exhausted!

Hugs to you all

Monday, March 26, 2012

Feeling hopeful today............

Hello friends!

Well, I don't want to jump the gun or get too excited here, but I think that my taste buds may be on the mend! I had some yogurt with my lunch today and I could almost taste the raspberry in it. It had a hint of taste to it and wasn't bitter like it has been. I couldnt get past taking a bit of yogurt and usually ended up throwing it out so finishing the whole container was a victory of sorts (in a weird way!).I came home and gave it my daily frosting test. I have been taking 1 tsp of frosting every day to see if I can taste it and today, it had more taste than it has all month! I could tell it was vanilla and it wasn't awful tasting like it has been. Perhaps things are regenerating?? I don't know, but I am feeling hopeful and just wanted to let you all know. I will continue to pray about it but perhaps things are getting better.

Thanks for your sweet comments & concern. You are all wonderful friends and I appreciate your emotional support during this challenging time . I wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy. Its no picnic when nothing tastes good.

I am going to make some veggie soup now so gonna say goodnight!


Saturday, March 24, 2012

I get by with a little help from my friends....please!

Hello all!

Well, today is Saturday and it is usually weigh in day for me but today, I decided not to go to WW. I just wasn't in the mood to rah rah about everyone else's success. Isn't that terrible of me to say? I have been in my pity party of one lately and the loss of taste has made me a bit despondent  & feeling hopeless that I wont regain my taste of anything pleasant (sweet).I feel like I have been pretty good, although it has been very challenging to eat since my taste buds have gone to the wayside. Its going on a month in a few days and it is VERY depressing to say the least. You would think I would be dropping weight like crazy not eating alot but not the case here. I feel so "stuck" and I want to get my weight loss going again and so I need your help all my BFC friends. Since fruit & yogurt and anything sweet for that matter taste absolutely awful, I would really like your help to try the BFC again. I LOVE WW....don't get me wrong, but I cant eat the things I used to and until my taste buds return( I pray they do!!!) I would really like to give this plan a good whirl & see if it can help me get "Unstuck". So if you all would, can you please give me some good tips that have worked for you and tell me some good things to start eating on the BFC. I will warn you, I am not a huge egg fan and they are one of the things that don't taste great. I can pretty much eat anything that isn't sweet and is rather neutral or bland. Chicken, fish (not a big fan of that) pretty much any kind of meat, etc all go down OK without bad aftertaste. Sprouted wheat bread and peanut butter are 2 of the things that I can tolerate best. No Natures Hollow, No coconut bread, no coffee (oh how I miss this one!!)...its all yucky to my taste buds & leaves a horrible aftertaste. I have a really hard time eating all the fat that is allowed on this plan & I think that's why I struggled so much with it before. I would like to try a lower fat version if possible. Your input is valued & appreciated. :) I know so many of you have had incredible success on this and I really need help getting rid of my belly. My legs & butt are pretty skinny now and I really dont need to lose any more in those areas. I need help with my apple middle. I want to lose this belly!

My weight is holding steady at around 174.5-175. I want to break into the 160s by Easter (169) and I am hoping this might give me the push I need. Also, would you please post how much you lost on your first few weeks following BFC & the things you noticed most. Thanks girls.

Not much else going on here....same old, same old... Hope all is well with you.

Have a wonderful weekend!
Love & Hugs~

Monday, March 19, 2012

So I saw the Dr. today.....

Hi Friends
Well, just got back from the ENT Dr. appt and he found nothing wrong with me, as I suspected. I feel fine & didn't think I had a sinus infection or an ear infection. I was following up with a Medical Dr. as I was told by my dentist. He said that my dentist "needs to do better" and come up with a reason why this happened. He thinks it is related to the dental procedure/Novocaine. He did order a CAT scan as well as a B12 level but he said they are long shots as he thinks they will come back negative. So where do I go now? I don't know. I have a call in to the dentists office & am waiting for them to call me back. I am afraid I will get weepy & I don't want to do that but on the other hand, I don't want to live my life not being able to taste again. I pray this isn't my fate. I wish I never had to have this done. I cant stand the awful taste in my mouth and the thought of never being able to taste anything pleasant again is beyond words....beyond depressing.

So that's my update. Sorry its not a very upbeat post here. I'm just not feeling very happy these days.  I will just leave it up to God to fix this one. Thanks for listening.


Sunday, March 18, 2012

An update....with photos!

Hi friends!
Well, its been awhile (again) since I have posted so I figured I would give you all an update on the taste bud situation. Sad to report that absolutely NOTHING has changed and I still cant taste anything but bitter and sour. It is going on 3 weeks in a few days and it has been quite a miserable few weeks. I have been googling like a crazy person and have an appt to see and ENT (Ear Nose & Throat ) specialist tomorrow. Praying he will be able to shed some light on the situation and offer me an effective treatment plan. I hate to sound like such a downer lately but when all you can taste is metallic/bitter 24/7, it makes for one to become a bit cranky, and I have definitely become  a bit cranky for sure. Fruit tastes terrible. coffee tastes awful too. Anything remotely sweet gives me a horrible bitter aftertaste. Here's a good analogy for you. Imagine the taste of getting hairspray in your mouth....that's what my mouth tastes. It is disgusting! Ive read that disruptions in taste can be re: to ear & sinus infections. I feel great but perhaps I have a "silent" infection??? I don't know but it is very depressing to eat anymore. Please say a little prayer that this will end soon.

Now, You would think that I would be dropping pounds left and right now, wouldn't you?? Well, not the case! I lost .2# last week (that's not 2#, its .2 or 4 ozs! *sigh*), and stayed the same this week. My scale says 174.5. WW scale says 176. Damn clothes! Why cant we weigh in behind a private screen naked! lol. I should invent some weigh in clothing that is feather light for those who weigh in at WW. I think I would be rich, sipping a cold drink somewhere on a sandy beach somewhere warm! Anyone out there who can sew and want to join me in inventing this???lol!  Anyways, I am 174.5 on my scale and that is what I am going by. Period! My goal is still to hit 169.8 (minimum) by Easter and by golly, come hell or high water, I am gonna fricken do it!!! Grrrrrr!  I know that I need to be more active so with the weather being so nice, I am going to get out and walk at least 2 miles each day. Tomorrow morning I plan to hit the gym in the am & then take an evening walk after supper. We have had beautiful warm weather and I need to take advantage of it while it lasts. My sister and I walked about 2 1/4 miles today and it felt great to do that again. She is wonderful company and the time goes by so fast and there is never a loss of conversation. I LOVE my sister!!! She is really starting to show her weight loss too!

I put on my pair of Capri's today that I wore at the start of my journey at my parents anniversary party in Sept 2010. I will try to post the picture for you all to see how big they are on me now. Even though the scale has been at a snails pace (my fault for dilly dallying these last few months) when I put on these pants, I am reminded of how far I truly have come and it gives me the push to keep going. I cant wait to see that 169 on the scale and to buy a pr of size 12 jeans and not have them be tight. I can put on a 12 and zip them but I have muffin top explosion and its just not a pretty sight! lol.

                                         Sept 6, 2010   I am in the black & white sweater (2nd from left) Sorry the picture is not closer so you can see but I was very good at trying to hide & conceal my "largeness" behind other people. BTW~ This is my family. :) Favorite sister & WW buddy Rose is on the Far Right in the light blue blouse. :) You should see how great she looks with 35# off. Wish I had a good pic to post of her but I dont.

    Aug 2010 @ my 25th class reunion with a classmate. I know its not a great picture but you can see that my fat was hanging over the edge these capris .There was no extra room!

Here are the updated photos. These capris are like clown pants on me. I know you cant tell from the 3rd picture, but the crotch of these pants is way low! In the Sept 2010 photo, these capris fit just perfect & there was no extra room whatsoever.

Well girls...I will say goodnight for now. Wishing you all well. You are all in my thoughts.

Hugs & thanks for listening to me ramble about the tastebud dilemma. Its been challenging, scary & kind of consuming my life lately. You are all good friends to listen. Thank you!!!!

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

A little bummed here.....

Hi friends!

I finally got on the blogs for a bit. Still have many to read to catch up. I'm sorry I haven't been around. I had the weirdest thing happen to me since my dental crown prep was done March 1st and I have been in a bit of a depression about it. It seems that since I had my temporary crown placed, I have no taste sensation. I cant taste anything but VERY salty things, and I mean VERY salty! Not a good thing for the BP. Glad I don't have issues there. I have had a horrible bitter/metallic taste in my mouth for almost 2 weeks now & its getting old. I so desperately just want a taste of something sweet but whenever I try, it has no taste whatsoever and then my mouth gets such a horrible bitter taste, it just isn't worth it. I have called my dentist twice and he is baffled. I am hoping that once the permanent crown is placed on Thurs that things will go back to normal....I am hopeful .It is making me feel very despondent that I will never taste again. I made an appt with a Ear, nose & throat specialist for Monday and hopefully he can help. I cant imagine living my life like this with no taste.

Weigh loss has been very slow lately. I want to get into the 160s (169) by Easter. I am about 5# away. Not being able to taste has made it more challenging to stay on plan.

I have to pick my daughter up from soccer so I must sign off for now. Hope you are all well. I do miss you all and will get around to responding to your blogs.  I promise.


Thursday, March 1, 2012

A very quick post...

Hi Friends!

Well, it took me over an hour but I think I got caught up on your blogs. I didst see a post from Katie though.....anybody know if shes been on the blogs??

All is well here. I had today off and went to get my temporary crown today. The permanent crown will be placed on March 15th. I'm 2/3 of the way done with this saga and I will be glad when it is over. Ive had enough Novocaine, thank you very much.

Diet wise, I feel fantastic!!!! Got on the scale this morning and it looks promising....looks like down 2-3# this week, HOWEVER I never get too excited until I get on WWs scale. Theirs is the true number I go off of. I have been very good not eating between meals and only eating when I am truly hungry & stopping when I am comfortable SATISFIED, NOT FULL. Its been a sacrifice and it makes me happy inside to know that I am doing something this lent that isn't easy. I feel good, in control and am amazed at how little my body truly needs to function. Don't worry Rosalie, I am eating enough. lol. I find that dinner is by far my favorite meal so I always have a great supper. Tonight I had taco salad. It was weird eating it because I was still numb from the Novocaine, but it was almost 4pm and I was really really hungry so I made that jaw of mine work. hahaha!

Hubby is missing me and I need to go & pack my lunch so I will bid you all a short farewell for now. I will post on Saturday to let you know how my weigh in went.

Have a great rest of the week!!!