Hello BFC "Sisters"!!!
Well, yet another busy day @ work & didnt get out til 5pm. It is my daughters 12th birthday today & I wanted to run to buy her a little cake for her special day so I ran to the grocery store after work to buy a small cake & some ice cream. She will be thrilled!! I WILL NOT be eating any, not even a bite!! The truth is, I have NO DESIRE whatsoever to even have a bite. Holy cow!! Did those words just come out of my mouth (or off my fingertips?)??? Its true!!! Prior to the BFC, I too would have wanted a big ole chunk of that baby....but not anymore. I am finding my desire for sweets has really subsided since following this plan, something I NEVER dreamed would ever happen!! I love sweets.....I mean I LOVE LOVE LOVE SWEETS!! It has always been the best part of any meal to me and now, I dont really care anymore. What happened?? I do have a little sugar free Edys ice cream. We dont have Clemmys up here & I refuse to pay over $32 to ship Clemmys ice cream that is 5.99/qt. No way Jose!! I know that the sweetner isnt "legal" in BFC land but you know what....I dont really care. I am losing weight and inches & if a small bowl of it in the eve satisfys my desire for a treat from time to time, well so be it! Just my 2 cents....some may not agree with me but its ok. Im not perfect. The Edys sugarfree ice cream is an S/C of 4/1 per 1/2c & I usually buy the butter pecan flavor & add a few extra nuts. Its delightful!
So yes, 12 yrs ago, I was having a baby....actually, she is already officially 12. I had her @ 2:22 in the afternoon & she was (and still is) such a precious little girl!!! She reminds me that she is a "pre teen" & will officially be a teenage next year!! Where did the time go?? I feel like just yesterday that I had her. She was so tiny...7# 2oz. She is now in the 6th grade & weighs a whole 90# soaking wet. Shes tall thin & lovely young lady. Her name is Rachel which is Hebrew for "little lamb" & it fits her perfectly!!! She is beautiful, kind, sweet, smart & lovable, gentle spirited & my cuddler!!! She just got home from swimming practice now & she informed me that she wants cake!! lol. She has to eat some soup before she has cake so I will finish up here & then go sing to my baby girl. I also remember that I weighed 232 # the day I delivered. ((Sigh)) I love kids but am grateful for the 2 beautiful daughters God has blessed me with & I am grateful that I dont have to ever be pregnant again!! Its a wonderous time in your life & one that I will always cherish & be thankful for but it is very hard on the body & I remember crying in the Drs office every time I had to get on the scale. I gained 55# with each pregnancy...not fun!!! IT was very depressing to look at those numbers going up @ every Dr visit and I vowed to NEVER see that number again!!
So in closing, I have to tell you what happened today at work. We have a wonderful female plastic surgeon who comes to the surgery center I work at. She and I were the only 2 in the locker room this morning (fate?) and I said to her..."you know, I was wondering if you could look at my appendectomy scar & tell me if you could revise it?" I showed her the scar & she said that it is all below the belly button & she would be happy to fix it! I told her my plans of losing 44-50# by my next bday & that I wanted to come & see her about a tummy tuck/scar revision. She told me to lose the weight (her words were to "deflate" my belly...lol! I wish I could deflate it!!!) & we can do the surgery. She said it is a life changing surgery & I will be so happy with the results. Oh, and she said she offers nurses a great discount too!!!Can I just tell you....I feel like I have my fire "fueled" with a purpose now!! All these yrs I have always wondered if it could be revised & now that I know that it can, I am so excited!!!!!!!!!I have always dreamed of having a flat tummy. I have lived my entire life with this disfigurement & I told my husband tonight that I am going to have the surgery to have it fixed next yr. as my bday present. I know its not an easy surgery but I know the closer I can get to my ideal body weight, the better the results will be and I am going to make that happen!!! As I said in an earlier post, no matter how much weight I lose, the only rememdy to fix my belly will be to have the scar removed & a tummy tuck. I used to care what people would think if I got one....would they think Im "shallow" or vain?? But they dont know what its like to have lived with this scar.....and frankly, now I really dont care what they think anymore!! I am going to do this for ME!!! I am gonna buy me some sexy panties from Victorias Secret!!!! I cant wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Makes me want to try even harder!!!! Hope that wasnt TMI again.....Thanks for listening.
So thats my day! How was yours?? I hope you are all well & staying true to your BFC plan, & if you had a hard day, remember tomorrow is a new day and you get to start over , hit the reset button & wipe the slate clean!!!
Good nite & sleep tight my "sisters"!!! You are all the Best!!!!!
Love & Belief!